The improvements in my wife’s health have relaxed over the past several days. It felt like things were slipping away, for the worse. Fears of another very difficult stretch of life were creeping into my mind. I also felt doubts. Doubt that God is good. Doubt that God is in control and working to brings good things to those who love him.
This time, I did not indulge my low feelings or my doubts. I fought them. I prayed that God would defeat them and help me to live with by faith, not by sight or reason. “God, fill me with the Holy Spirit and make his voice loud in my soul.” I watched a sermon on spiritual warfare and a second on the Holy Spirit. I felt I was refocusing on God and living my life according to his faithfulness. I read in God’s word from Psalms when King David was delivered from the hands of his enemies who had kept him on the run and in hardship fearing for his very life. He felt like God wasn’t doing anything to deliver him for a long time; his heart ached. He kept moving forward, though; believing God would deliver him. He held to the faith that God did have a plan and was going to be faithful to it. In Psalms, we get to see the day God delivers David. In our lives, we are still living them out, so we have to wait to see that day of complete deliverance. In the mean time we must learn to live by faith.
Vanessa had three or four bad days in a row not really getting out of bed from nausea and some abdominal pain. The third night, (two nights ago) she had a vivid dream in which she was hurting. In this dream she said aloud, “Jesus is my healer, by his power I am well.” Vanessa woke that morning feeling well. She felt well all day. She ran around town, smiling, laughing, we had a coffee date, and a dinner date. She bought baby clothes for two expecting friends. We rejoiced in the blessing of a great day given to us by the Lord. We felt this was a confirmation, and blessed reward for winning a spiritual battle. The battle against doubt, lies of Satan, and clinging to the Word of God and living by faith, not by sight.
This morning, she wakes with nausea. The battle is laid out in front of us. We must not live by sight or experience, but by faith.
Deuteronomy 8:2-3: Don't forget how the LORD your God has led you through the desert for the past forty years. He wanted to find out if you were truly willing to obey him and depend on him, so he made you go hungry. Then he gave you manna, a kind of food that you and your ancestors had never even heard about. The LORD was teaching you that people need more than food to live--they need every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord."
Romans 8:28 29 - "We know that in all things God works for good with those who love him, those whom he has called according to his purpose. Those whom God had already chosen he also set apart to become like his Son, so that the Son would be the first among many believers."
This time, I did not indulge my low feelings or my doubts. I fought them. I prayed that God would defeat them and help me to live with by faith, not by sight or reason. “God, fill me with the Holy Spirit and make his voice loud in my soul.” I watched a sermon on spiritual warfare and a second on the Holy Spirit. I felt I was refocusing on God and living my life according to his faithfulness. I read in God’s word from Psalms when King David was delivered from the hands of his enemies who had kept him on the run and in hardship fearing for his very life. He felt like God wasn’t doing anything to deliver him for a long time; his heart ached. He kept moving forward, though; believing God would deliver him. He held to the faith that God did have a plan and was going to be faithful to it. In Psalms, we get to see the day God delivers David. In our lives, we are still living them out, so we have to wait to see that day of complete deliverance. In the mean time we must learn to live by faith.
Vanessa had three or four bad days in a row not really getting out of bed from nausea and some abdominal pain. The third night, (two nights ago) she had a vivid dream in which she was hurting. In this dream she said aloud, “Jesus is my healer, by his power I am well.” Vanessa woke that morning feeling well. She felt well all day. She ran around town, smiling, laughing, we had a coffee date, and a dinner date. She bought baby clothes for two expecting friends. We rejoiced in the blessing of a great day given to us by the Lord. We felt this was a confirmation, and blessed reward for winning a spiritual battle. The battle against doubt, lies of Satan, and clinging to the Word of God and living by faith, not by sight.
This morning, she wakes with nausea. The battle is laid out in front of us. We must not live by sight or experience, but by faith.
Deuteronomy 8:2-3: Don't forget how the LORD your God has led you through the desert for the past forty years. He wanted to find out if you were truly willing to obey him and depend on him, so he made you go hungry. Then he gave you manna, a kind of food that you and your ancestors had never even heard about. The LORD was teaching you that people need more than food to live--they need every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord."
Romans 8:28 29 - "We know that in all things God works for good with those who love him, those whom he has called according to his purpose. Those whom God had already chosen he also set apart to become like his Son, so that the Son would be the first among many believers."
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