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Gosh Darnit... People Like Me!

And Gosh Darnit!... People Like Me.

I was at the hospital talking to another resident. She was describing how she cannot stand this other person. I inquired as to why she didn't like this person. She described back several things that just rubbed her the wrong way. “Causing" her to not like the person.

Thought one:

What are the things that people say bad about me behind my back? What do I do that rubs people the wrong way?

Thought two:

Who likes me to my face, but has disdain for me, to my back?

I asked this person in all seriousness, "what do people say about me when I'm not around?” She assured me that she has never heard anyone say anything but good things about me. She asked me the same question. I assured her the same. We then agreed to update each other if we did hear anything bad.

Thought three:

Why do some people seem to have such a hard time working along side of doctor X? I think people all have good aspects to their personality, habits, ethics, communications; they have bad traits as well. I hear a lot of 'complaining' about doctor X. I am often surprised by this. I don't really find their estimation to be true in my experience. Then as I think about it, I can sort of understand how they arrived there. But they blow it all out of proportion. I really like doctor X!

Conclusion:

What personal attributes you CHOOSE to focus on will directly your experience of a person. Positive or negative. Experience then affects your overall opinion of them. Your opinion affects how you work with them. How you work with them affects their experience of working with you. Positive or negative. Their experience affects their overall opinion of you. And that affects how they work with you.

As you can see, a cycle has been built. It all starts by focusing on the negative aspects of a person. Try to appreciating the good in them. It is there... if you had looked for it.

I have genuinely appreciated and enjoyed every attending physician and health care professional that I've worked with during my residency. Some are easy to work with. Some are challenging. Many a fellow residents can name someone they don’t like. Numerous attending physicians can tell you things they do not like about those residents. Coincidence?

The Moral:

Judge not, lest ye be judged.
Focus unto the good, so thoust good be focused upon.

David MD

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