Does anyone else feel sad at Christmas? I usually am having a great holiday spending time with family, visiting friends, and having time off of work... then it happens. I feel sad. Down. Just as the sadness hits for the year, I it strikes me, "I felt sad last Christmas too!" I try to hide the sadness. I try to put on a fake smile so that others won't notice.
Why do I feel sad??? It always hits immediately after or during the gift exchange. Some of the proposed mechanisms for this "bad" feeling are discussed below:
1. I may feel guilty for getting expensive things, when others have little or none.
2. I know that I feel bad when I find myself not liking a gift that was given to me. Sometimes the reason I don't like the gift is because I think its ugly... and I know that the person who bought it for me thinks it's wonderful... This makes me feel horrible, I feel as if I am pretentious, elitist or a snob. Though to have different tastes is only natural.
3. I also feel bad (more guilt here) for putting on a polite smile (which we all know means "fake") and try to look excited while opening a gift (while I think about exchanging it... mentally tallying up its dollar value).
4. I feel bad when I get a gift that I've done perfectly well without, a gift that has little or no return or exchange potential, a gift that will now be a rarely or never used "thing" to clutter up my home. I hate clutter, its oppressive.
5. I feel guilty for not giving gifts of the same total dollar value to the person with whom I'm exchanging. This year my wife said, "well, next year we'll be able to give more but we had a small budget this year." I felt myself feeling worse after that... I was hoping maybe we could institute a spending limit so we wouldn't get so much stuff next year. Or possibly avoid gift exchanging altogether.
That's just about it....
No, wait, here's more. I don't like eating Christmas sweets, but I do it. Poor self-control in the face of impulse. They're bad for me. I don't want to become fat or clog my arteries. There's a reason I don't buy that stuff!!! If its at my house, I eat it... then I feel bad about it afterwards. But if I throw it away as soon as its given to me, I feel guilty for not being grateful. I feel like I threw it away in front of them and then spit in their face.
After all of my junk I just laid down on the screen above, I come to the most powerful reason I feel bad... I see all of the gluttony, materialism, and pleasure-centric festivities involving so many "Christians" (myself included) yet none of us did anything to love the poor, the hungry, or the suffering this Christmas. I feel like a fraud. Isn't that the whole point of being "Christ-like"?
I don't I want any gifts next year. I don't think I even want to give gifts next year. No, I take that back... I do want gifts, in the form of gifts given to the poor in honor of how I feel about Christ. I would also like to get my family and friends together for a great dinner to celebrate community and love... then go out and love our community. Maybe then I wouldn't feel sad at Christmas.
David
Why do I feel sad??? It always hits immediately after or during the gift exchange. Some of the proposed mechanisms for this "bad" feeling are discussed below:
1. I may feel guilty for getting expensive things, when others have little or none.
2. I know that I feel bad when I find myself not liking a gift that was given to me. Sometimes the reason I don't like the gift is because I think its ugly... and I know that the person who bought it for me thinks it's wonderful... This makes me feel horrible, I feel as if I am pretentious, elitist or a snob. Though to have different tastes is only natural.
3. I also feel bad (more guilt here) for putting on a polite smile (which we all know means "fake") and try to look excited while opening a gift (while I think about exchanging it... mentally tallying up its dollar value).
4. I feel bad when I get a gift that I've done perfectly well without, a gift that has little or no return or exchange potential, a gift that will now be a rarely or never used "thing" to clutter up my home. I hate clutter, its oppressive.
5. I feel guilty for not giving gifts of the same total dollar value to the person with whom I'm exchanging. This year my wife said, "well, next year we'll be able to give more but we had a small budget this year." I felt myself feeling worse after that... I was hoping maybe we could institute a spending limit so we wouldn't get so much stuff next year. Or possibly avoid gift exchanging altogether.
That's just about it....
No, wait, here's more. I don't like eating Christmas sweets, but I do it. Poor self-control in the face of impulse. They're bad for me. I don't want to become fat or clog my arteries. There's a reason I don't buy that stuff!!! If its at my house, I eat it... then I feel bad about it afterwards. But if I throw it away as soon as its given to me, I feel guilty for not being grateful. I feel like I threw it away in front of them and then spit in their face.
After all of my junk I just laid down on the screen above, I come to the most powerful reason I feel bad... I see all of the gluttony, materialism, and pleasure-centric festivities involving so many "Christians" (myself included) yet none of us did anything to love the poor, the hungry, or the suffering this Christmas. I feel like a fraud. Isn't that the whole point of being "Christ-like"?
I don't I want any gifts next year. I don't think I even want to give gifts next year. No, I take that back... I do want gifts, in the form of gifts given to the poor in honor of how I feel about Christ. I would also like to get my family and friends together for a great dinner to celebrate community and love... then go out and love our community. Maybe then I wouldn't feel sad at Christmas.
David
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