Stress. The worry and pain of health issues... money, work, worries, fights against materialism... feelings that life isn't what I desire it to be... and even sometimes the feeling that I wish I could escape it all.
Thunderstorm. I sat here on the porch... its 11pm or so, during a violent thunderstorm. In it, I see and feel God. I sense power, magnitude... chaos in parallel with control... beauty... violence... order and precision... art and science. I feel alive! I feel insignificant and yet also significant at the same time. I feel as if I found a piece of myself that was lost. I feel as if I could reach out and touch God... that He is near to me and that my life is going where He wants it to go. I feel that I can reclaim what used to be me... that I can be myself again. How was it that I got lost? I do not know... but tonight I felt a heart wrenching seizure of my "self"... I don't want to let it slip away.
If this isn't making complete sense... its because it doesn't make complete sense to me. It is a swirl of emotions... tears well up; mixture of sadness and euphoria. I do not know how to describe it all... but its all there, and it feels good.
David
Thunderstorm. I sat here on the porch... its 11pm or so, during a violent thunderstorm. In it, I see and feel God. I sense power, magnitude... chaos in parallel with control... beauty... violence... order and precision... art and science. I feel alive! I feel insignificant and yet also significant at the same time. I feel as if I found a piece of myself that was lost. I feel as if I could reach out and touch God... that He is near to me and that my life is going where He wants it to go. I feel that I can reclaim what used to be me... that I can be myself again. How was it that I got lost? I do not know... but tonight I felt a heart wrenching seizure of my "self"... I don't want to let it slip away.
If this isn't making complete sense... its because it doesn't make complete sense to me. It is a swirl of emotions... tears well up; mixture of sadness and euphoria. I do not know how to describe it all... but its all there, and it feels good.
David
Comments
Post a Comment